Adoption Loss: When Grief is Suffocated When someone we love dies, grief can feel suffocating. The fact that we will never talk or touch the person we hold dear again is overwhelming. It is hard to assimilate the loss of a...
Adoptee Reunion: In Praise of Cousins I am on vacation. Why am I writing a blog on a much needed vacation? Because I just had a reminder about how pleasant it is to be reunited with cousins. The first person I...
Ambiguous Loss: Living with the Pain of Uncertainty Before I was a therapist, I had not heard the term ambiguous loss. I know now that I experienced it. Ambiguous means inexplicable. These ambiguous losses of mine were deeply felt for many...
Is there something that happened in your past that you cannot stop thinking about? An incident or relationship that continues to feel deeply sad, shameful, or distressing? The past shows up through rumination, nightmares, or flashbacks. The experience may be...
Uncovering Your History is Your Right In Georgia, SB64 is a bill that would allow adoptees over 18 years of age access to their original birth certificates. So far, the bill has passed unanimously through the Senate. Hopefully, by the time...
My original birth certificate cost me five dollars. Arizona - state of my birth and adoption - enacted a law that allows adoptees to obtain their original birth certificate. The law was effective on January 1, 2022. I sent in the...
The big holiday month is here. If you have discovered a family secret that impacts you, the holiday season presents an extra challenge. Will you be able to fake happiness or act polite with people close to you that have...
Leslie Pate Mackinnon, LCSW is a seasoned and well-respected therapist in both the adoption community, third party reproduction, and MPE (misattributed parentage event) communities. She is a nationally known trainer who travels across the country training therapists, agencies and child...
In the fog. A statement that used to mean waking up and not being able to see out my window. I grew up in California. A foggy morning meant that my carefully curled, fine hair would not last from my...
I've been thinking about adoption loss and grief. Specifically - ambiguous loss, disenfranchised grief, and uncertainty. Whew - quite a mouthful! In my mind's eye, I keep seeing stages of grief as clothing hangers that adoption loss hangs on like a...